Having long wondered why anyone wants to advertise that they are the proud owners of a puking shit machine by sticking a sign on the back of their car, the following new baby on board sign, whilst damned amusing, is a sure fire way to get yourself touched up by the humourless plod (read on below) :

Guaranteed shroud waving frenzy generating device.

The humourless plod in question being the following little tale :

COPS ordered a baffled motorist to pull over on a busy Midland motorway – to ask him about joke fake bullet hole stickers he had put on his car.

The driver claims he was stopped by a West Midland officer while driving towards Junction 8 on the M6, near Walsall, and was forced to come to a halt on a congested lane, as there was no hard shoulder.

The father, aged in his 40s, from Birmingham, said the officer ordered him to remove the labels.

Yet West Midlands Police have confirmed that the stickers are not illegal.

The motorist, who does not want to be named, said: “I knew I’d done nothing wrong so I wondered if it was because I had a faulty light or something when I saw the officer indicating that he wanted to speak with me.

“There was no hard shoulder, due to roadworks, so I had no choice but to stop on the carriageway.

“The officer asked for my licence which he took to his car and checked.

“I was so surprised when he returned and claimed that the reason for the stop was due to having ‘bullet holes’ in the back of the car.

“The stickers belonged to my son and were put on as a joke.

“They’d have come off in the next wash.”

The officer then allowed the motorist to leave after the driver promised to remove the stickers when he got home.

The driver added: “He gave me some advice on rejoining the motorway and off I went. I removed the stickers because I didn’t want any hassle.

“I fully support the police but it must have been a very quiet morning.

“Good job I’d didn’t have a water pistol in the car, they might have called the firearms squad in.”

He said the incident happened in February.

Fake bullet stickers are readily available to buy on the internet for £5 for a packet of 20.

West Midlands Police spokeswoman Gina Lycett, said: “We have checked and the driver was not committing an offence having the stickers on his car.”

The last line there making it seem as if they were determined to get him for something, probably to justify their own uselessness.