Is it any wonder that the UK is disappearing up its own arse when we have this kind of crap passed off as news by our state broadcaster (and don’t you just hate their one statement to a line dumbshit ™ style these days) :

Reality TV star and former cage fighter Alex Reid has called for a ban on school packed lunches in a speech in Parliament.

Mr Reid, ex-husband of celebrity Katie Price, said he wanted supermarkets, banks and big business to fund free, healthy school meals for all children.

He said pupils were eating chocolate and crisps which were “affecting their ability to concentrate in lessons”.

Mr Reid was speaking to the All-Party Group on School Food.

Mr Reid and Ms Price, the writer, TV reality show star and model also known as Jordan, divorced last month and he is now engaged to former Big Brother contestant Chantelle Houghton.

Mr Reid told MPs about plans to raise £1 billion by offering companies promotional opportunities, including direct marketing to parents, in return for investment in a scheme called Let’s Do Lunch.

He said his proposal would remove the financial burden of providing school meals from the taxpayer.

“The important thing is the Let’s Do Lunch marketing would help companies investing in the scheme to generate more revenues,” he said.

“I want to make healthy school meals available to all kids.

“We will essentially make them compulsory and ban packed lunches.”

I think I just lost the will to live …