I was going to refrain from writing about Christwire.org for a while following on from my post here which suggested that they were a serious competitor to The Daily Mash but I am afraid I will have to quote from another of there articles just to prove that giving hard drugs to Christians is a very bad idea judging from the content of this piece :

The British are up to their queer tricks once again! The same people who brought the world the antics of Oscar Wilde and John Cleese, have now invented something called “monkey voting.” As the video below shows, it’s an odd service that the Labour-controlled government provides for shut-ins, welfare recipients and other strange English people. Call up your local “estate council” office and they’ll send a trained monkey to pick up your ballot form for the next election.

Fair enough so far even if it does sound like a Python sketch.

The bit that really caught my eye though was here (emphasis mine) :

There’s no telling if ballots are altered in little monkey hands. Maybe this doesn’t matter. I doubt the Brits are cognizant enough to notice if the will of the populace was replaced by the will of a million simian primates screeching for fruit. Remember, this is the same country that lost one of the greatest empires the world has ever known because they didn’t know how to plug a few holes in a few leaky ships… The same country that today worships an old lady who looks like a trucker in a bra… The same country whose biggest contribution to the global fight on terror is a few dozen weak-wristed troops in soft red berets…

I am assuming that reference is to the Queen as I can’t think of any other old ladies being worshipped around these parts?

So, just remember, keep the columbian marching powder away from those pesky botherers before this stuff starts popping up here in the UK on a Sunday morning. Coked up old ladies going on a rampage would not end well.

And if that doesn’t convince you then how about this from the same place :

My friends I hate cats. We all know the story: spread rabies, are involved in witch ceremonies and they even were worshipped as gods by Egyptian Africans.

Cats have a history of being corrupt and it is a sad shame that they are not extinct. If I had the power, I would create a super-virus to wipe them all out and make God proud!

Sure, critics out there will say if cats are so evil, then why did God created them? Well how about this?

If Satan is so evil, then why did God created him? Think about it.

The point is that things can turn evil and that is what has happened to cats over time. Cats are now tied directly to hell and we would be better off just having them all killed like we would do any other sin soaked vermin.

Dogs are a good, Godly creature and each day we share heartwarming stories of how dogs save their owners, unlike cats, which are users and are walking microcosm of the blacks in welfare system.

Cats need to go ahead and be extincted, so that we may have a better tomorrow for our childrens. Amen.

Truly bizarre!