From the crime reports section of the delightfully named Prattville Progress we have the following heinous crimes :

• Two bras were stolen from a department store on the 300 block of East Main Street on Jan. 13 at 5:20 p.m.
• On Jan. 13 between 9:45 a.m. and 5 p.m., a home on Cubs Place was broken into and a Taurus 38-caliber revolver was stolen.
• A theft reportedly occurred on Jan. 12 between 1:15 p.m. and 5:20 p.m. in a parking lot on East Main Street. During the crime, a purse, makeup and other items were taken.

I can only imagine that next weeks edition will be reporting on the local bank being held up by an armed transvestite.